Seriousness for a Minute

Why Are The Funny Ones Gay and Living in Paris and Too Old For Me?

“I look at these people and can't quite believe that they exist. Are they professional actors? I wonder. Or are they simply laymen who want a lot of attention? To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. "Can I interest you in the chicken?" she asks. "Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it? To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked."

- Author David Sedaris, on undecided voters

Man, I've loved Mr. Sedaris for a long time. Thanks to my brother, I give credit where it's due, who introduced me to Sedaris via Naked and I've read all of his books since. I'm currently making Tim listen to Dress Your Family in Denim and Corduroy via Audio Book the last few weekends while he works on Ben's costume and I attempt making more pants for Nate. Sedaris is damned funny, it's that simple. I could write pages but I'd just be repeating myself over and over and over. If you've never read his stuff go get something, anything of his now. If you can, get a copy of "Dress" or "Live at Carnegie Hall" and listen to the "Six to Eight Black Men" story. Kills me everytime and has forever changed our yuletide celebrations. Or watch this

WTF Wednesday

I learned this week, thanks to being up in the middle of the night and myspace and facebook that a couple (not that there are many) of my exes have recently gotten married. I think this is great, let me just say that upfront. I don't wish to be back with either of them and never have, honest. Tim never reads my blog so for those thinking I'm just covering my ass I don't need to. Consider yourself mooned. Anyway, I'm happy for them and yet there's a strangeness to it. I think it's simply the fact that now years (we're talking 11 years in one case, high school) later I'm seeing these images of the biggest day of someone's life and this someone is a guy that I used to kiss in the hall of my high school and hope to get notes from and haven't talked to since graduation. weird.

Anyway, this spring would be our ten year high school reunion. Our school, for some unknown reason doesn't do alumni relations. Though they should since they are semi-private. So we have to organize our own reunion if we want one and I just don't think that's going to happen. I don't know that I would go or not and I don't have to decide so it's not a big deal but there's a weird head trip that happens when you see wedding pics of your highschool boyfriend, or learn that you're childhood friend who walked home with you everday just had her second baby, that one friend is writing screenplays in LA, etc. It's hard to pull these faces out of these old memories and fit them into what you know to be actual now.

Again, I'm really happy for these people, as I'm happy that my life is what it is now. As much as I had some great memories in high school and was blessed with incredible friends I have no desire to relive it. I thoroughly believe that the best times are now and in the future and I refuse to let my kids limit themselves to thinking that high school is as good as it gets. With any luck they'll still think high school at home is awesome but I want them to realize how much more there is to life. I think that's why these wedding pics surprised me so much, not that I never realized we'd all grow up and have famlies and spouses and careers but that at 17 it was a relatively abstract thought and today it's our reality.

Natural Parenting Toolbox

It's 3:45am and I'm up with Nate watching Dora and running the humidifier and hoping that his Zyrtec kicks in he's able to breathe better soon which will lead to being able to nurse which I hope to Gaia will lead to sleeping. In an attempt to prevent myself from being super cranky, not fun, mean, loud, crabby mama tomorrow I found this list via Mothering and am posting it here as a reminder to myself to be patient with the world and most especially my children when Ben wakes me up for the day in about 3 hours.

Alternatives to Punishment

• Use positive reinforcement.
  
• Create a positive environment.
  
• Say yes as much as possible.
  
• Save no for the important things.
  
• Use natural consequences.
  
• Use logical consequences.
  
• Use restitution.
  
• Leave it up to your child.
  
• Compromise.
  
• State your expectations, and get out of the way.
  
• Give specific instructions.
  
• Give a reason.
  
• Offer help.
  
• Give a choice.
  
• Redirect your child.
  
• Remove your child.
  
• Make positive statements.
  
• Give in occasionally.
  
• Give your child time to agree.
  
• Simply insist.
  
• Make rules.
  
• Ignore some behavior.
  
• Avoid nagging and threats.
  
• Distract your child.
  
• Use humor.
  
• Make it a game.
  
• Be willing to admit your mistakes.
  
• Stop and think before you act.
  
• Don't make a big fuss over little things.
  
• Stick to routines.
  
• Don't hurry your children too much.
  
• Get to the root of the problem.
  
• Correct one behavior at a time.
  
• Give yourselves time.
  
• Use the golden rule.
  
• Model appropriate behavior.
  
• Think of your child as an equal.
  
• Always keep your love for your child in mind.

WTF Wednesday

Ok, I know it's Thursday but I meant to post this yesterday and then Roco's departure trumped any other posts. So, there's been lots of "talk" (I call it bullshit) about the new cover of W which features Angelina Jolie "apparently" breastfeeding one of her infants. I saw "apparently" because this is how I see it phrased whenever I've read about it. There's a baby with his/her head close to her breast and her shirt is opened but we can't be sure she's breastfeeding. Anyone else think apparently sounds like "allegedly" in this case? It's like they want to sound like they're giving her the benefit of the doubt - as if she's doing something else entirely like rocking the baby and her shirt just fell open that way. The hilarious and irritating thing about this is that you can hardly tell she is breastfeeding she really just looks like a happy mama enjoying a cuddle with her babe who happens to be nursing (although you can't see it in the pic) so IF you're one of those people who is saying how disgusting it is - get a reality check! I've seen more of countless other celeb's breasts selling magazines by featuring their breasts as accessories not showcasing their real purpose in the beautiful, natural way that Jolie does. Although, I realize we're not all lucky enough to have it be NATURAL for Brad Pitt to be taking the pic of us nursing.

I'm not going to rant and rave about this too much tonight - breath a sigh of relief or groan of disappointment here. I've got a lot to do for our local LLL conference (Please join us!!!) and the best way to be a Lactivist is to educate and empower and actually do something about improving the public image of breastfeeding in this culture, not just by blogging. So I'm off to be constructive. In the meantime here's the cover for you all. Comment away please! I will revisit this topic, I promise!

Bummed

We just found a new home for Roco Meowazaki. We're all bummed. It's that simple. Nate is seriously allergic. I had my suspicions about it last week but yesterday when Ben rubbed Roco on Nate's face and his eyes swelled up within 5 minutes and we had to go to our doctor, I knew it was true. The doc gave Nate Zyrtec and it certainly helped but he still doesn't look good and I had no doubt that it was because of the kitty. So...I posted to all of the playgroups we go to and got two great responses. My friend C came and adopted the kitty just 30 minutes ago. She surprised her son with him, who had been saving his money to buy a kitten. He was sooo happy and thankful to have Roco as his own and as grateful as I am that Roco is going to a good home all of two miles away from us, I'm also heartbroken at having to watch my son's reaction to losing his first real pet.

I know it had to be done. There was no way that I'd medicate Nate indefinetely just to keep a cat but it still sucks. hard. I think in a few days Ben will be totally all right about it and not really care too much but tonight, watching him cry and now seeing him curled up on the couch with Tim just reminds me of how fragile we are all. How easily bruised our hearts can be no matter what our age is.

Blue Job-Picture Post

Family foliage shot


Nate slept 2/3rds of the way up the mountain. So I carried him on my back, that's why he looks kind of mumified in the pic.


From the top of Blue Job.


Another top shot.


Benny on the way back down. I love the light in this shot.

Nate stayed awake on the way down. He also kept patting my back....guess I'm part horse.


Ben on the rocks. I love this picture. It almost doesn't look real.